howcouldiknow

I have survived a hectic couple of weeks and am still trying to figure out my routine, catch my stride and adjust.  I spent the last week in transition; moving out of my old apartment in Rochester I then stopped in my old hometown of Columbus, Ohio.  I saw my Mother, my Brother and a few other familiar faces, then hopped in my car packed full of my belongings and my beautiful bicicleta.  I feel liberated knowing I can load my car up with pretty much everything I need for three months and drive off to wherever I please.  This time it was Chicago, Illinois; in which I arrived Thursday night.  My new apartment for the summer was not ready until Sunday night which caused a little turbulence but I am now settled in my new place in Logan Square. I am happy with the house, the neighbourhood and my roommates.  Once the dust settled I realized I am a little off kilter here still.  I was so busy being frantic and then it all came to a halt.  No more moving, no more driving, and only two days a week at the Museum, what do I do with myself?   I am on the prowl for a job and working on forcing some structure upon myself.  As student we get so used to having the structure of college to regulate our studies and recreation.  I feel like I have become so reliant upon this that I do not know what to do when I am without it.  I have one more year and then I am going to have to learn to structure my own life, and develop good behaviors without the threat of professors, grades and my friends.  I honestly have no clue how this works but I know what will happen if I lose control.  My perpetual state is one of self-awareness but inaction.